害怕，原来可以这样写——心理描写周复盘
恭喜你完成了一周的心理描写训练。今天我们不写新内容，把七天的学习浓缩成一张速查表：原文、生词、骨架、模板、技法，全部收进来。这一周你从"看故事"升级到了"看门道"——现在，把门道装进口袋。
本周回顾
周一：拆原文。《夏洛的网》第7章 Bad News（353 词）——老羊上门、噩耗、求证、崩溃与承诺、夜晚的恐惧与安慰，五段逐段拆了 29 个生词（envy / sob / tremble / comforting…），配单词汇总表。
周二：拆骨架。7 个心理描写骨架——心理动词引语 / 心愿独白 / 内心呼喊+身体反应 / 念头来袭 / 心理状态对比 / 焦虑动作外化 / 安慰语气回应，每个配公式和"你来试一试"。
周三：应用。四层心理模板——出声→心愿→念头→落点，用"演讲前夜"完整示范，再用挖空练习亲手填了一篇。
周四：吃透。内心独白三式——心理动词引语 / 心愿独白 / 念头来袭，加终极公式和逐句替换练习。
周五：家庭复盘。六问亲子检验——故事讲了什么 / 用了哪些心理动词 / 四层模板 / 内心独白三式 / 哪句心里话最动人 / show, not tell，外加家长常见误区。
周六：实战检验。批了一份 52 分的考场习作《转学第一天》——七大失分点逐个批注，改后拿到 93 分，三种病（标签病 / 哑巴病 / 平路病）+3 道加练。
这周最大的变化：以前写害怕只会写"I was afraid"——现在你会写"Maybe I can just stay home," I thought，会写"the thought of ... came to me"，会写"One part of me ... another part ..."。同一句 I was afraid，现在能写成一句心里话、一个念头、两个打架的声音。心理不再靠"报"，而是靠"演"。
原文速览
来自 E.B. White《Charlotte's Web（夏洛的网）》第 7 章 Bad News（坏消息），共 353 词。五段依次是：老羊上门、噩耗、求证、崩溃与承诺、夜晚的恐惧与安慰。这是本周一切练习的源头，值得反复朗读。
One afternoon the oldest sheep walked into the barn to pay a call on Wilbur. "Hello!" she said. "Seems to me you're putting on weight." "Yes, I guess I am," replied Wilbur. "Just the same, I don't envy you," she said. "You know why they're fattening you up, don't you?" "No," said Wilbur.
一天下午，老羊走进谷仓来拜访威尔伯。"你好！"她说。"我看你好像长胖了。" "是的，我想是这样，"威尔伯回答。"话虽这么说，我可不羡慕你，"她说。"你知道他们为什么把你养肥吗？" "不知道，"威尔伯说。
"Well, I don't like to spread bad news," said the sheep, "but they're fattening you up because they're going to kill you, that's why." "They're going to what?" screamed Wilbur. "Kill you. Everybody is in the plot—Lurvy, Zuckerman, even John Arable." "Mr. Arable?" sobbed Wilbur. "Certainly. When a pig is to be butchered, everybody helps. Arable arrives with his .22, shoots the..." "Stop!" screamed Wilbur. "I don't want to die! Save me, somebody!"
"唉，我不喜欢传播坏消息，"老羊说，"但他们把你养肥，是因为他们打算杀掉你，就是这么回事。" "他们要干什么？"威尔伯尖叫道。"杀掉你。所有人都在这个阴谋里——勒维、祖克曼，甚至约翰·阿拉布尔。" "阿拉布尔先生？"威尔伯抽泣着说。"当然。猪要被宰的时候，人人都来帮忙。阿拉布尔拿着他的点二二步枪来了，开枪打……" "别说了！"威尔伯尖叫道。"我不想死！救救我！"
"Be quiet, Wilbur!" said Charlotte, who had been listening to this awful conversation. "I can't be quiet," screamed Wilbur, racing up and down. "Is it true what the old sheep says, Charlotte?" "Well," said the spider, plucking thoughtfully at her web, "the old sheep has been around this barn a long time. If she says they plan to kill you, I'm sure it's true."
"安静，威尔伯！"一直在听这场可怕对话的夏洛说。"我安静不下来，"威尔伯尖叫着，跑来跑去。"老羊说的是真的吗，夏洛？" "唔，"蜘蛛若有所思地拨了拨她的网，"老羊在这谷仓里待了很多年了。如果她说他们打算杀你，我相信是真的。"
Wilbur burst into tears. "I don't want to die," he moaned. "I want to stay alive, right here in my comfortable manure pile with all my friends. I want to breathe the beautiful air and lie in the beautiful sun." "I don't want to die!" screamed Wilbur, throwing himself to the ground. "You shall not die," said Charlotte, briskly. "Who's going to save me?" cried Wilbur. "I am," said Charlotte. "How?" asked Wilbur. "That remains to be seen. But I am going to save you, and I want you to quiet down immediately. I can't stand hysterics."
威尔伯放声大哭。"我不想死，"他呻吟着。"我想活下去，就待在我舒服的粪堆上，和我的朋友们在一起。我想呼吸美丽的空气，躺在美丽的阳光下。" "我不想死！"威尔伯尖叫着，把自己摔在地上。"你不会死的，"夏洛干脆利落地说。"谁来救我？"威尔伯叫道。"我来救你，"夏洛说。"怎么救？"威尔伯问。"这还有待观察。但我一定会救你，我要你立刻安静下来。我受不了歇斯底里。"
Twilight settled over the barn. Wilbur heard the trill of the tree toad. But the thought of death came to him and he began to tremble with fear. "Charlotte?" he said, softly. "I don't want to die." "Of course you don't," said Charlotte in a comforting voice. "I am not going to let you die, Wilbur." Wilbur was trembling again, but Charlotte was cool and collected.
暮色笼罩着谷仓。威尔伯听着树蟾的颤音。但死亡的念头向他袭来，他开始害怕得发抖。"夏洛？"他轻轻地说。"我不想死。" "你当然不想，"夏洛用安慰的语气说。"我不会让你死的，威尔伯。" 威尔伯又在发抖，但夏洛冷静沉着。
生词速查（29词）
29 个词，与周一单词汇总完全一致，格式同样 4 列。
单词
词性
释义
变形搭配
envy
v./n.
羡慕、嫉妒
envy sb sth 羡慕某人某物
sob
v./n.
抽泣、啜泣
sob one's heart out 哭得伤心欲绝
moan
v./n.
呻吟、悲叹
moan about sth 抱怨某事
cry
v./n.
哭、叫喊
cry for help 呼救
burst into tears
phr.
放声大哭
burst into laughter 突然大笑
tremble
v.
颤抖、发抖
tremble with fear 怕得发抖
fear
n.
恐惧
for fear of 唯恐
comforting
adj.
令人安慰的
comfort (n./v.) 安慰
hysterics
n.
歇斯底里（认知词）
in hysterics 发作
pay a call on
phr.
拜访
pay a visit to 拜访
putting on weight
phr.
长胖、增重
lose weight 减肥
seems to me
习语
在我看来
It seems that... 看起来……
replied
v.
回答
reply to 回复
spread
v.
传播、扩散
spread bad news 传播坏消息
fatten up
phr.
养肥
fatten sb up 把某人养肥
butcher
v./n.
屠宰
butcher a pig 杀猪
plot
n.
阴谋
be in the plot 参与阴谋
bad news
n.
坏消息
No news is good news.
racing up and down
phr.
跑来跑去
race (v.) 飞奔
awful
adj.
可怕的
awfully (adv.) 非常
pluck
v.
拨弄、摘
pluck up courage 鼓起勇气
thoughtfully
adv.
若有所思地
thoughtful (adj.) 沉思的
have been around
phr.
阅历丰富
be around 见过世面
stay alive
phr.
活下去
alive (adj.) 活着的
throw oneself to the ground
phr.
扑倒在地
throw oneself into 投身于
remain to be seen
习语
拭目以待
It remains to be seen whether...
twilight
n.
薄暮、黄昏
at twilight 在黄昏时分
trill
n.
颤音
the trill of the tree toad 树蟾的颤音
cool and collected
习语
沉着冷静
collected (adj.) 镇定的
7个骨架速查
周二从原文提取的 7 个心理描写骨架，浓缩成一张表。
① 心理动词引语
"They're going to what?" screamed Wilbur.
② 心愿独白
I want to stay alive, right here in my comfortable manure pile with all my friends.
③ 内心呼喊+身体反应
"I don't want to die!" screamed Wilbur, throwing himself to the ground.
④ 念头来袭
But the thought of death came to him and he began to tremble with fear.
⑤ 心理状态对比
Wilbur was trembling again, but Charlotte was cool and collected.
⑥ 焦虑动作外化
"I can't be quiet," screamed Wilbur, racing up and down.
⑦ 安慰语气回应
"Of course you don't," said Charlotte in a comforting voice.
四层模板速查
周三的心理描写四层模板，按"出声—心愿—念头—落点"组装。
Level 1（开场） 出声 · 心理动词引语
用 screamed / sobbed / whispered 替 said，让情绪先出声
"I can't do this!" whispered Mia
Level 2（中段） 心愿 · 内心独白落脚
I want to ... right here in ... with ...，把愿望落到具体地点与人
I want to stay alive, right here in my comfortable manure pile with all my friends.
Level 3（中段） 念头 · 念头来袭想法冲突
But the thought of ... came to him，让念头自己找上门
But the thought of death came to him and he began to tremble with fear.
Level 4（收尾） 落点 · 情绪落点心理弧线
用 in a ... voice 一句安慰接住，或让他自己做出决定
"Of course you don't," said Charlotte in a comforting voice.
技法速查卡
全周六个教学点，一个一张卡，最后一条易错提醒最重要。
内心独白
把心里话直接写成引语
"Maybe I can just stay home," I thought.
写成"他很害怕"标签，或混入心跳、发抖等外显
心理动词引导
用 wondered / told himself / hesitated 把"想"写具体
She hesitated, wondering whether she should open the door.
通篇只会 said 和 thought
想法冲突
让两个念头打架
One part of him wanted to run, but another part stayed.
只写一边，拉扯消失
回忆闪回
让记忆突然涌上来，成为现在决定的理由
A memory flooded back: her smile, her voice, the way she waved goodbye.
闪回与当下决定无关
期望与担忧
hoped / feared / wished 并排写
I hoped someone would say hello. I feared the empty chair beside me.
只有担忧，没有期望
心理变化弧线
同一件事，开头和结尾心理不一样
The fear did not disappear, but it shrank a little.
开头怕、结尾好，中间没有转变过程
本周练笔：续写结尾
Wilbur 在 Charlotte 的承诺里安静下来，但那天夜里，他独自躺在谷仓里，看着月光洒在夏洛的网上。请用本周技法（内心独白 / 期望与担忧 / 心理变化弧线，任选两种）续写 2-3 句，开头已给：
Wilbur lay alone in the barn that night, watching the moonlight shine on Charlotte's web. "Maybe she really can save me," he ________.
参考答案：Wilbur lay alone in the barn that night, watching the moonlight shine on Charlotte's web. "Maybe she really can save me," he thought. He hoped the morning would bring an answer, but he feared the long wait more than anything. The fear did not disappear, but it no longer filled the whole barn.
用到的本周内容："Maybe she really can save me," he thought（内心独白 · 心理动词引语）、hoped ... feared ...（期望与担忧并排）、did not disappear, but it no longer filled（心理变化弧线）。写作文就是往模板里填自己的内容，这周学到了吗？
今日一句
"It is not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves." — Edmund Hillary
我们征服的不是高山，而是自己。